AI streaming service launches racy period drama about couple who can afford a house
Viewers say A Hard-Earned Semi is the most emotionally charged depiction of mortgage eligibility since the early 2000s.
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Longevity supplement industry exposed as elaborate scheme to get middle-aged men to drink glass of water
Researchers say most benefits previously attributed to advanced cellular optimisation may have come from men briefly stopping coffee, beer, and spite.
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‘Wealth taxes don’t work’ says dragon atop pile of treasure
A cave-based asset owner has warned that taxing large fortunes would punish ambition, damage confidence, and make it harder for young dragons to one day sleep on a mountain of other people’s gold.
Elon Musk ‘unable to generalise beyond his training data’
Researchers say the system appears to confuse pattern matching with thought, a known failure mode among large language models, reply guys, and men who own too many companies to be corrected properly.
Humanity to build Dyson sphere once it finishes making every app slightly worse
Experts say civilisation is close to harnessing the full power of the sun, pending completion of its current project to make every useful thing more expensive, confusing, extractive, and shit.
New AI model withheld after live-translating CEO as ‘it means layoffs’
Internal tests found the system could remove enough corporate language for staff to understand what was happening.